Monday, 13 June 2011

Cutting down meds

I’m now on day 7, and I'm grateful that I haven't taken a drink today or for the last 6 days. I'm slowly coming off the Librium and I've got more energy and don't need as much sleep during the day even though I'm still tired. I've got a sponsor now and I've even managed to help a couple of other people to get to AA meetings. I'm going to continue on the acamprosate, the anti craving drug, for about 3-6 months on the advice of my detox nurse. This is mainly because it's still very early days and I work in a pub. If all is going well, I'm hoping to get off that as well. I'm not a big fan of taking medicines, but sometimes it's necessary and at the moment I'll do anything to stay sober.

I feel positive and for the first time in a very long while I'm actually looking forward to slowly starting to sort my life out. There are so many things I've neglected during my drinking days, money issues, relationships, studies, my own wellbeing and much more. My nurse said that I can safely go back to the gym in about 5 days when the effects of the Librium has started to go away. I'm taking my last one tomorrow night.

My close friends have given me amazing support and I will be eternally grateful to them, my partner, the doctors and nurses, and most of all to AA and the people I've met there. I finally told it all to my parents and they reacted suprisingly calmly. My father said he'd know for years that I'm an alcoholic but realised that saying anything about it would not make much difference. He has asked questions about my drinking in the past and I've always brushed it off and said I party at the weekends, there's no problem with that! But he obviously knows me better than I thought. My mother is worried of course but she knows my personality type and is convinced that I'll make it once I've put my mind to it, bless her. My sister is also an alcoholic and she's read the letter that I sent to my mother. I don't know what she is thinking right now as I haven't spoken to her, but I do hope that it has touched her in some way. I would love for her to get sober, she is such a wonderful human being, intelligent, and deserves a better life.

That's my rambling for today. One day at a time!

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