Tuesday, 26 July 2011

7 weeks

With the help of the rooms, my sponsor, my Higher Power and my loved ones I've now reached 7 weeks. During this short journey so much has changed and almost all of it for the better. Actually, nothing has changed for the worse! Today I've felt that laughter that comes from the pit of your stomach, that real joy over some silly little thing that makes you giggle. I used to have to be half-cut before anything like that would manifest, and towards the end it didn't manifest at all. I feel truly blessed at being able to laugh honestly and in a heartfelt way. It's just one of the great joys of sobriety that I'm experiencing at the moment, and one that I'm so grateful for.

Is this the pink cloud? Actually, don't tell me because I don't really care. I'm going to enjoy this elated feeling for as long as it's there and count every blessing and stay grateful. One day at the time.

I just realised that I'm writing this after a fairly horrible day. Work was manic with loads of customers, tons of orders in the kitchen, arguments and mistakes and general chaos. After that lunch time session I was ready to drop! I even told my boss that it was an awful shift, upon which she apologised (?). I have no idea why she apologised and I told her so. Anyway, somehow I just carried on working in the bar afterwards, talking to one of our house guests and other people and it all sort of disappeared and I haven't really thought about it since. It's strange as I would have dwelled on it in the past to the point of driving me crazy, but today, even though it was tough at the time, it didn't touch me in the same way. Another thing to be grateful for!